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#Humor

31 posts30 participants3 posts today
Public
«Harvey Esquire»

When asked about which countries that may be placed under his next travel ban, he replied "Wouldn't that be a stupid thing for me to say?".

Adding, "NOBODY expects My Travel Ban! Our chief weapon is surprise ... surprise and fear ... fear and surprise .... Our two weapons are fear and surprise ... and ruthless efficiency .... Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency ... and an almost fanatical devotion to the Putin."

#Mastodon#Saturday#weird
Replied in thread
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Pseudo Nym

@Enalys

GM: you received a magical boon - what do you wish for?

Wyrmling, really into role playing his middle aged "parent" character: "the ability to awake well rested after a night's sleep!"

GM: nice, 50xp for staying in character, and not min-maxing. Granted!

#ttrpg#humor
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Zhi Zhu 🕸️

The DOGE Helpline

Comms from Armageddon
snyder.substack.com/p/the-doge

"The scene: an office in the #WestWing ... with a "DOGE Helpline" sign on the door. Four consumer relations specialists take phone calls.

Rep 1 "...The point is to create the conditions for the survival of the fittest. That's #American, right?"

Rep 2 "We... create an #environment of desperation and hatred of Americans. #Americans will show their best side in these situations"

Headline and text: The DOGE Helpline Comms from Armageddon by Timothy Snyder Mar 08, 2025 The scene: an office in the West Wing of the White House, with a "DOGE Helpline" sign on the door. Four consumer relations specialists take phone calls. Rep. 1 "Yes. Here's the theory. We call it libertarianism. For now, anyway. The point is to create the conditions for the survival of the fittest. That's American, right?" Rep. 2 "We got rid of USAID and foreign aid to create an environment of desperation and hatred of Americans. Americans will show their best side in these situations." Rep. 3 "The FDA was wrong to track food-borne illnesses. We need an honest competition among digestive tracts out there." Rep. 4 "Consumer Protection just makes people stupid. It should be killed. Americans should be able to identify bank fraud by themselves." Rep. 1. "Yes, we define what is natural and what is fitness." Rep. 2. "You see, the FBI is an unnecessary government intervention. Americans are best placed to handle crime by themselves. We need to allow Americans to take part in an unfettered competition against organized crime." Rep. 3. "We take a different view. Infectious disease is in good. It weeds out the weak and the unfit. We want measles back. And polio. Right. You're catching on. Toxicity in the environment is also good. For the same reasons. EPA will have to be scaled way back."
#Satire#Humor#Musk
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