personal experiences with narcisstic abuse, advice
The answer to how to deal with a narcissist:
Don't.
You cannot win in an argument against them. They will never concede. They will always find some reason to attack you. They are masters of getting others to be unwitting pawns in abusing you (this is called triangulation, and they love doing it). The only winning move is not to play. Tell them you're sorry they see things that way and move on.
personal experiences with narcisstic abuse, advice
An old favourite of narcissists is to confuse the fuck out of you.
They love to love bomb, and will make you feel like a million bucks at first.
Then when you don't meet their standards, they will push your buttons, and they're good at making it look like you're the problem to others. And then they'll be nice to you again, roping you back in.
This tactic is the single most damaging part of narcissistic abuse. It leaves victims highly confused.
personal experiences with narcisstic abuse, advice
Narcissists rarely seek treatment. Often they are good at concealing their condition from therapists and mental health practitioners. Deep down they know what they are and they don't see a problem with it. Some even shop around for therapists and get other diagnoses to help cover up the narcissism.
personal experiences with narcisstic abuse, advice
Narcissists will use other conditions to hide their narcissism. My narcissistic abuser hid behind ADHD, CPTSD, RSD, trauma, neglect, lurid stories, etc. And it's convincing at first, Hell I was convinced at first.
re: personal experiences with narcisstic abuse, advice
@Elizafox (however, one must always remember that these conditions are still real and do not neccessarily mean someone's an abuser – because that would also be something a narcissist would like to have you think)
re: personal experiences with narcisstic abuse, advice
@kescher mhm! absolutely.
personal experiences with narcisstic abuse, advice
personal experiences with narcisstic abuse, advice
Narcissists love gaslighting, accusing others of doing what they're doing, and especially get a kick out of anything that makes them feel powerful and important. This is because deep down they are fragile and highly insecure. This is why you can never criticise or say no to a narcissist. They tend to explode with anger and upset. And they split easily in the psychological (not plural) sense. You can become Satan to them instantly.